Sewer Explosions, Strange Timing, and Chris Brown

this week has been quite a week.

and today has been quite a day.
my Flemish cousin, Joris, is in NYC this summer and we decided to meet up today. we met at the entrance of the Chrysler building after work. we strolled along the block and then decided to go into Grand Central to take the 4 5 6 downtown for dinner. after being in Grand Central for not more than 2 minutes, there was a huge commotion and people started to run away from the Lexington Ave doors and into the station toward us. things felt very wrong. there was panic in the air. and we all started running. everyone in the station. the people behind us kept looking back toward the doors and then running. and strangely no one was saying anything. i hadn't heard gun shots or explosions but the fear in the air was impossible to miss. we all ran away from the exit and into the main concourse area. i was thinking very clearly the whole time. Joris and i held hands. we tried to avoid stampeding crowds. and we looked for another exit. we ran with strangers. we kept on hitting dead ends that had train platforms but no street exits. and since we were all thinking terrorist bombing we all were trying to get to the street. finally people were shouting that they found an exit. we got out onto Lexington and it looked like there was smoke pouring out from a building behind us. all this mud/ash was falling on us from the sky. we all started running down the street away from the smoke. it was incredibly surreal. crowds of us running down the middle of the street. people pushing and yelling to get further away. the cars stuck. people's shocked faces looking behind at the smoke in the air. we had ash/mud/whatever it was all over us. Joris and i ran with the crowd a few blocks and then people dissipated and we walked west all the way to 9th ave. i wanted to walk as far away from the financial district as possible and once we reached a west-side residential area we stopped. at this point though we knew that whatever had happened was not such a big deal. and we enjoyed dinner with a Belgian beer to toast the strange conditions of our reunion.
finding out later it was just a pipe explosion made me feel silly for being so scared. but it was nonetheless a memorable experience. and writing about it now, the images of my strange afternoon chill me. all of us running through grand central. people in business suits, people grabbing their children. people in the streets terrified and confused and pointing at the billowing smoke.
the fear and hyper awareness of terrorist attacks is incredibly real. and this afternoon proves to me that none of us feel any safer from this war.

and after watching Sicko and then talking with Joris about the Belgian health care system, Europeans view of the US and our war, and the Belgian government...i am not so into America.

on a more positive note, this afternoon showed me how well i perform under pressure and chaos. it makes me feel more confident that when shit goes down, i know i won't crumble into hysterics.

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GIRLS GROUP.
oh my, what an improvement from last week. its going so well. the girls seem to enjoy it. 3 new girls have asked to join! i am enjoying it. we've been discussing some important stuff and some girlie stuff. chris brown is apparently the hottest boy around. and lil' wayne is whack. but i also am learning about the racial cliques in some schools. and the racial cohesion in others. and the pressures that my girls feel. and what they love about themselves.